Ah, another glorious week passes by, leaving in its wake a question: "what did you do this week?" Well, I played video games, rested, and tried getting better after having been sick for two or three years. Many years of trying to come up with new ideas led to solitude and a catharsis of sorts. I freed myself from the fear of social phobia, acquired many a life experience and found hope, for myself and perhaps others. Thankfully, I'm far from being a guru of any sorts, still troubled as I am by my troubles. Yet, somewhere between the march of technologies and artistic fervor, I managed a balancing act for a few years, all the while expunging a sadness as a torrent of words as I wandered outside in nature.

Nature always listened to my rantings as I wandered about the city's bike paths.

I fancied myself as doing parkour, in fact, as I wandered the city. I even did a nice jump from a 2nd story building to a nearby warehouse roof, thereby acquiring parkour legitimacy. Quite pointless and exhilarating! I then wandered about the roof until I found a place I could leap down from, unto a piled pack of pallets. I bruised my foot jumping down, and the bruise on my big toe was quite nasty. It was the 2nd time I tried it that jump too. You see, I'd developed a mad theory, that Kirchhoff's laws and simple ascii code was the key to the universe. 0 is index, or discovery, 1 ☺ ordered, 2 ☻ chaos, 3 ♥ love, 4 ♦ completion, 5 ♣ home. Now, by going about my path, I could loop about, exactly like an electric circuit, and the vast computer that is modern society would respond accordingly. That is, go someplace once, and it was orderly, 2nd time was chaotic wildness and contradictions, and the third visit was a lovely time. Now, were I skewed ever deeper into madness was when I realized that discrete numbers were pure worldly convenience. After all, 2 leads to 3 if you count properly! Which meant that... the 2nd trip, if prolonged, led to love! Harrumph. A very fancy way of saying, kiss on the 2nd date if it goes very well, poor fool that I am. Something most people have figured out much earlier than me, I'm sure. And no, I never got my system higher than five, so counting up to ten is a challenge, okay? I mean, what does ascii 10, '◙', even mean? I'm sure my fevered mind would have come up with something. Negatives was the reverse of course. And, I figured Newton was correct: make it up to two at least, and then coast onwards to easy street. Or a broken heart. -♥

So, I wandered the city in delirium and jumped off a roof, is what I'm basically saying. It'll take me a year to get my mind untangled.

The affection and love I never received is a lack, but more accurately a gap I find I can actually bridge now. My parents, in their rejection of religion, each decided to burn bridges in their own way, and from this rebellion forged their identities. They would never admit to it, but their are both very similar. We all are, I'm slowly realizing. No one is that far from another, in spirit and actions, or in atoms. 

When summer ended, I sat on a parc bench, stared out over a river, and said "thank you" to the Wild. I found symbolism and meaning in this, and I hope you find it as well.

I wish dev art let us select the font. I asked for fonts in a question to the DevArt FAQ. Fonts♥♥♥

Link me if you like me! Bros linking to niceness!
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